• Sharon Gulley

No One Listens To Me


Sometimes, when we aren't listened to or heard a few times in a row, and we may develop the belief that no one listens to us. This limiting belief can cause us to speak in such a way that makes it hard for others to listen (passive or shy). It is important to remember that everyone is different and we all have busy lives. Always be confident in what you are saying and speak with assertiveness. Even if you have some days where it seems like no one is listening to you, it may be just a bad time to speak with certain people because of their own issues.

Stay positive and don’t let bad listeners or bad experiences get to you.

Here are some things to consider:

  • First, ask yourself: Is this the case all of the time?

  • Who are you trying to communicate with?

  • Are you speaking clearly? Loud enough?

  • Do people have preconceived ideas about you that might cause them not to listen or take you seriously? I myself have struggled with this when trying to speak to people older and sometimes younger than myself. They believe that I am not either mature enough or too old to listen to because of my age.

  • Perhaps what you’re talking about does not appeal to the person you’re trying to talk to. (for example: talking about hockey or football to a person who hates sports)

  • Are you assertive or passive? People are less likely to listen to a passive person than an assertive person.

  • Are you talking about yourself too much? Often, people love talking about their self, but rarely want to hear about others.

  • Consider if what you are talking about has a point to it. Is it interesting? Is it valid? Are you rambling or ranting about something that you don’t need to be? Could it be wasting the other person’s time?

These are just some possibilities. I suggest you be assertive and ask them why aren't they listening to you? Be assertive, not aggressive. If you do this enough, you will likely find your answer and be able to fix whatever the issue is.

Coach Sharon G


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