I've Found Me in this Place.
Often, we seek for acceptance. We are always wanting approval of our deeds, our efforts, many times even our lives. But one thing that I found to be the most rewarding was when I found me; in this place. As an only child, we are required to get good grades, be on our best behaviors, eat our vegetables and say "yes ma'am and no ma'am' (which has now become a thing of the past). As an only child, there was no one to be compared to. No one! The load was on me and me alone. But in seeking to live up to the standards of others, I found myself sitting in the seat of unforgiveness, pregnant at fifteen and confused about who everyone wanted me to be. But no longer is that my story.
It took me thirty-eight years to find me! Thirty-eight years to remove myself from the shadows of approvals. From the torment of just wanting to be without stipulations. In school I hung with all the groups. I sat at all the tables. Many people knew me because of who I was affiliated with, but no one ever really knew the real me. I have siblings but we did not grow up in the same households and to be completely honest we are still not that close. But in this season in my life, I found me in this place. In this place there is fullness of joy. I love me. I go and come as I please. I am able to express myself without backlash. I am able to laugh out loud and give less that two cares about what others think.
I am not cocky, but I AM WHO I AM! In this place, I am free to lift my hands. Free to do my dance. Free to snap my fingers to the rhythm of my own beat. Free to love God. Free to love me. In this place I found me! So as we end this bit of dialogue, I implore you to find out who you really are; good, bad or indifferent. Walk in it! Forgive, love and laugh real hard! For it my friends is real good for the soul.
Coach Sabrina B.